Trillin’s “Fly Frills to Miami” makes a picnic in an airplane “normal.” When Trillin’s wife Alice complains about travel expenses, Calvin decides to go cheap by purchasing food from New York to Miami. Based on “Alice’s Law of Compensatory Cashflow,” the result is a comic riff on gluttony.*

Not content with a measly sandwich, this carry-on bag is more than a match for Water Rat, the picnic connoisseur in Kenneth Grahame’s The Wind in the Willows. Explaining this to Mrs. Infield, who is sitting next to him, Trillin explains, “My picnic had been gathered partly by my wife, an Eastern sophisticate who knew that arugula was not a folk dance and could poach a salmon in some secret way that made it taste as good as barbecued ribs. I also pointed out that except for a mix-up, the main course of my picnic would have been cold fried chicken from another of our neighborhood restaurants, the Pink Teacup—a no-frills sot that has the look of a Harlem café transplanted to Bleeker Street.”

When Mrs. Infield looks in the seat next to him seems nonplussed, Trillin explains, “The meal was incomplete because it’s missing the fried chicken,” Not knowing what to say, she responds, “You must be a gourmet eater.”

Trillin’s menu includes Caviar, Smoked Salmon, Crudités with Pesto, Tomato-Curry Soup, Butterfish with Shrimp Stuffing, Gelée, Spiced Clams, Lime and Dill Shrimp, Tomatoes Stuffed with Guacamole, Marinated Mussels, Assorted of Pâtés, Stuffed Cold Breast of Veal, Chocolate Cakes, Praline Cheesecake, Italian Cheesecake with Fresh Strawberries, Grand Marnier, and Pouligny-Montrachet.

Featured Image: Detail of the first edition dust jacket by Sam Cooperstein.

See Calvin Trillin. “Fly Frills to Miami.” In Alice, Let’s Eat. New York: Random House, 1978. Also, *W.C. Fields’ gourmand three-day picnic is posted elsewhere.